Do you fear being judged?
When you start out in business, fears of judgment and comparison can be quite common. You might worry about what your friends or family think. You might worry about connecting to your ideal clients. You might worry about how much to share about yourself online. How do you share who you are in a way that feels balanced for you?
Over time, you figure it out. You find your way of sharing that feels great. You connect. Your business is growing. You stop worrying so much about what others think and go for it.
Down the track, it changes again.
Many of my entrepreneurial clients have a pretty high profile. They’re very visible online. They have lots of followers on Facebook, Twitter and/or Instagram. Popular blogs. They are known for their successful businesses. Often turning over six figures, in some cases, they’re turning over hundreds of thousands of dollars or even into the millions.
Life continues to happen. Different problems arise. Sometimes disasters occur in your personal life. You go through a crisis in your business. You get “haters.” You have problems with your team. Your family-of-origin implodes. You divorce. You want to change direction. You struggle on with an issue (for example, weight, relationship, unwanted singledom, infertility etc) that you just can’t seem to resolve. You struggle with fatigue. You have new dreams. Childhood stuff comes back up to the surface. Cash flow dries up. A launch bombs. You hit upper limits.
You want to continue to be authentic. You want to be real. But it can feel a little harder.
How much do you share with your community? Thousands are now reading what you write. You have a brand to consider and protect. Although you probably don’t REALLY think you have to be perfect and problem free, and certainly that’s what you’d tell your clients, the balance can feel a little harder to find when you’re going through challenges.
And who do you go to for support?
“Everyone” knows who you are. They perceive you in a certain way.
My Kinesiology clients sometimes tell me they can find it hard to find someone to confide in. Someone they know they can trust. They feel so public! They’re even worried I might judge them. (As if I would. I have my own set of issues and blocks, just like everyone else!)
They worry they might be judged for:
- Having problems full stop
- Struggling with an aspect of the very thing they help others with
- Not having it all together (like maybe they’re awesome at business but really stuck somewhere else)
- Not doing the things they know they need to do, or that they tell others to do
- Having money blocks, particularly if they’re known for being successful
- The size of their goals (like they might be embarrassed to tell me they want to align to earning multiple hundreds of thousands a month, or even a million a month. I say: let’s do it!)
- Having “haters” or people who don’t like what they do
- Having family or relationship issues, or struggling to find the love they desire
- Not measuring up to their shiny online persona – occasionally I have clients tell me they are awesome at presenting an image of success, but the reality in terms of income is (so far) very different
- Sabotaging themselves
- Feeling jealous of the success of others
Of course, when we fear being judged by others, we’re actually judging ourselves.
I get it. I really, really do.
I have struggled with this too.
At the end of 2013, I left my marriage. It wasn’t planned. But then I had a week that looked a little like this:
“When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready.
The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back.
A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.”
– Paulo Coelho
Within that week, I knew I would move back to Adelaide to be closer to family. I knew I would shift my business to working online with my gorgeous clients. I knew I had a ton of healing work ahead of me.
And I did that work.
As a result, I am stronger, clearer and more deeply compassionate towards myself and others. And I am a far more powerful practitioner as a result of what I have lived. And if you’d like support as you go through your own challenges, I can help.